Ephesians 5:21-30

Rachel Workman: ²¹ And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

²² For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. ²³ For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. ²⁴ As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything.

²⁵ For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her ²⁶ to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word.^{[b] 27} He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. ²⁸ In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. ²⁹ No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church. ³⁰ And we are members of his body.

When I read these verses, I question my past marriages. Did I submit to my husband? I can tell you the answer is no. Nor did they submit to Christ. Nor did they love me as they loved themselves. It's pretty easy to justify my reasoning. But nowhere did it say submit to your husbands as to the Lord only IF your husband submits to Christ and loves you like his own body. It says submit to your husbands as to the Lord. I should have submitted and let God work on their submission.  

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Mike Grimm: ²¹Be subject to one another out of reverence for Christ.

²²Wives, be subject to your husbands as you are to the Lord. Submitting to another person is an often misunderstood concept. it does not mean becoming a doormat. When we submit to God, we become more willing to obey His command to submit to others, that is, to subordinate our rights to theirs. In a marriage relationship, both husband and wife are called to submit. For the wife, this means willingly following her husband's leadership in Christ. For the husband, it means putting aside his own interests in order to care for his wife. Submissions rarely a problem in homes where both partners have a strong relationship with Christ and where each is concerned for the happiness of the other.  ²³For the husband is the head of the wife just as Christ is the head of the church, the body of which he is the Savior. ²⁴Just as the church is subject to Christ, so also wives ought to be, in everything, to their husbands. This kind of mutual submission preserves order and harmony in the family while it increases love and respect among family members.

Paul told wives to submit to their husbands. The fact that a teaching is not popular today is no reason to discard it. People act like God said that for those times, and now He doesn't believe it applies. Like 2000 years ago God had no idea what Mike Grimm would be doing at 3:00 pm on May 21st, 2020. According to the Bible the man is the spiritual head of the family, and his wife should acknowledge his leadership. But real spiritual leadership involves service. Just as Christ served the disciples, even to the point of washing their feet, so the husband is to serve his wife. A husband is to love his wife as he loves Christ. A wise and Christ honoring husband will not take advantage of his leadership role, and a wise and Christ-honoring wife will not try to undermine her husband's leadership. Either approach causes disunity and friction in marriage.

²⁵Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, ²⁶in order to make her holy by cleansing her with the washing of water by the word, ²⁷so as to present the church to himself in splendor, without a spot or wrinkle or anything of the kind—yes, so that she may be holy and without blemish. Christ cleansed the church by the "washing" of baptism. Through baptism we are prepared for entrance into the church just as ancient Near Eastern brides were prepared for marriage by a ceremonial bath. It is God's Word that cleanses us. ²⁸In the same way, husbands should love their wives as they do their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. ²⁹For no one ever hates his own body, but he nourishes and tenderly cares for it, just as Christ does for the church, ³⁰because we are members of his body.

Paul devotes twice as many words to telling husbands to love their wives as to telling wives to submit to their husbands. How should a man love his wife? (1) He should be willing to sacrifice everything for her. (2) He should make her well-being of primary importance. (3) He should care for her as he cares for his own body. No wife needs to fear submitting to a man who treats her in this way.

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John Burnett:  ^21 [a]and be subject to one another in the ^[b]fear of Christ.  This command seems to be an afterthought in this section of scripture but is bigger than that.  Paul is trying to unify the church in it’s theology.  Today the church is split into many different denominations and doctrinal camps.  There is only one true church, those chosen by God to be saved by His grace.  Born again believers who become a new creatures with the help of the Holy Spirit. 

Marriage Like Christ and the Church

²² Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. ²³ For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. ²⁴ But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. 

²⁵ Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, ²⁶ so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, ²⁷ that He might present to Himself the church ^[c]in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless. ²⁸ So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; ²⁹ for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, ³⁰ because we are members of His body.  These verses have taken a beating over the years from the feminist movement.  When sin entered the world in the garden, enmity between husband and wife became a consequence of sin.  The commands in verse 22 for wives and in verse 25 for husbands have been pitted against each other since the beginning of sin.  Christ is the example and His sacrificial love for His bride, the church, should be what we strive to achieve.  If husbands love their wives, the way Christ loved the church, they would happily submit. 

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Tomorrow’s reading for Ephesians 5:31-33

³¹ As the Scriptures say, “A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.”^{[c] 32} This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one. ³³ So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.